If you have read even a slight bit of my posts, you might know that I am a night owl, night-o-holic, nyctophile, name it whatever. I love the nights and everything surrounding it. The peace, the quiet, the entwined length of it, the sea of ideas, nostalgia, reflection, contemplation, I could go on and on.
A few days back, I met with an accident, which again you might/might not be privy to from my previous posts. Any which way, I started going by company cab, instead of my bike; I have booked it for a month. And it drops at sharp 8 in the morning. Prettttty early by my standards. My whole routine has taken a 180 degrees turn.
I sleep early fearing I won’t wake up on time. The fear is such that I feel guilty in staying up late, how people on diet cringe when they eat high calorie food. I even have to leave from work at a fixed time. I get a feeling like I was some carefree bird few days back who is now caged. I even figured(in just a span of 8 days by cab) that I prefer chaos more to a set routine. What is happeningggggggg?
Anyway, came across a resonating word today (Source: TFD)
So here’s what I am doing right now, staying awake, which I love.
Mornings, Early sleeps: With all due respect, Buzz Off!
Do you have a friend who corrects every word you misspell? And cringes on every wrong pronunciation you make? Like their only purpose to be alive in this ever-so-happening world, is to pin point at your petty lingual mistakes. In that moment you want to kill them. Choke them around the neck and kill them! But then they happen to be right and you make a dorky face and let it pass! Do you have such friend or am I the only one doomed? Words like poignant, petulant, nonchalant, bourgeois….I would have never known how these words are spoken(rightly) if not for this nemesis cum friend. I am seeing her tomorrow after quite a few days. Looking forward to the trouble. :-). <3.
What do I write today?
Hope: Whatever you want your grand children to read in future and smile!
Skepticism: I am not sure I’ll reach to a point of having grand children.
Faith: Oh sure you will. Okay, write about something you believe in.
Insecurity: What can I possibly offer that hasn’t been said already?
Mind: Every individual brings something new to the plate.
Heart: Let’s just go ahead and lament about lost love and what could have been!
Angel elf: You don’t have to be sad all the time. Temperate is good too. Take time.
Demon elf: Sulk baby sulk. Better than that, complain about people who have done wrong to you!
Strength: Why not encourage others? On how things always get better. Trust your instincts.
Desire: Create something magical. Your words shall enchant.
Girly side: Let’s talk about the pretty dresses you bought and ooo! those nail paints.
Independence: Let’s not waste time figuring out people. Explore broader horizons.
Persnicketiness: Watch you words.
Conscience: Chuck it all. Do what you want!
One dainty human and a sea of emotions! Today we just wonder about the possibilities.
Can you go on throughout the day without speaking a word? Like a pithy okay and nice from your mouth, a bit of please, thank you here and there, that’s all, nothing else. Does that make one weird? On days when I have had close to null interaction, and I am ruling out social media talks or texting, I strangely tend to talk to myself!
Left late from office today. And just before I was moving to the parking lot to get to my scooty(we need to call it with a better name!), I heard these roaring thunderstorms. Cacophonic, slightly intimidating. It hadn’t started raining yet. To soothe myself, I uttered in my head..garajte badal baraste nahi..(it’s kind of a hindi counterpart for barking dogs seldom bite…that literally means thunderous clouds don’t quite give a rainfall). I think the clouds took umbrage in it. It pricked them right at the spot, because the wrath of rain that I faced thereafter was something! Heavy and getting heavier by the second. I was all drenched and shivering and uttering on my way: fuck! Never smart mouth the nature next time.
I will resume my interaction with humans from tomorrow.
There are a thousand words in English language to express whatever tiniest kind of emotion you feel, and yet sometimes silence speaks best. When I am not talking to you, when I am clueless on your whereabouts, when several days have rolled by without our imbecilic banters, no giggles, no snuggles, I recollect myself, and acknowledge the silence between us. It comforts me in a weird sense. Wind tries to appease me and nights accompany me to mad lands. Mornings pamper me with flashback of our moments and the mirror urges me to smile. I know. You and I will be gnawed within the trivialities of words someday. You’ll prick me and I’ll quarrel with you. But take your time. Fix your troubles. When I see you next, we will disrupt the stillness with irregular breaths. Oh, no words yet darling. Silence will do the talking. <3 .