If someone comes along and glues your broken pieces together and then crushes you suddenly, ain’t that double the harm done?! The once glued broken pieces will further shatter into tiny shards, you know n*2 times, and eventually you will just vanish like the dust. Lately, I am not understanding how human relations work. What is supposedly right? What is morally right? How to deal with situations that are beyond your control? I sure tell myself, don’t turn into a crazy person, but I have symptoms galore. This is not even frustration, it is like I have come in terms with the restless side of me. God is not helping too. Will do something absurd in coming days to feel better. May be cut short my hairs.
#silly talks..absolutely silly!
I pile on. Things. Emotions. Boxes. Clothes. All tangible/intangible stuff. I pile on every stupid thing. From a chocolate wrapper to some shirt’s button, I collect them all. I broke a hair band today and disposing it away pinched me a little! Now when I write it here, I realize the heights of absurdity in it. Losing anything does not come easy to me. I cling to it till it’s absolutely necessary to get rid of. I am (eventually) understanding that it’s not helpful in the long run. Soon I’ll be in a room full of nothing but non-essentials. It is already filling up. Why don’t I live out of my brain for a day? Use someone else’s head may be. And then get rid of all these things. Doing it myself would only seem a treason to the aforementioned NON HUMAN things. I’ll figure out a way. You dear shoes, have served me well when the time existed. You pretty shirt, were my easiest rescue for many a days. I think I am sleep talking, writing! Time to part ways.
What’s with me and coming late to office these days? Today is one of those mornings when I am getting random thoughts about getting old. Well, I am not looking old now..but I will at some point of time. I dread it. I know it sounds very superficial, but do we only have this irrevocable option to succumb to life? Time won’t stop on our wish. People will change and won’t remain the way you want them to stay. You will age! Is a person supposed to turn despondent?! Or start practising nihilism as a more severe step. Just continuing with angst in your mind does not seem like an option to me. I need quick fixes. I need effective fixes.
If I reflect on myself, I am so mad at a particular person I might..well forget it. I am not even mad. I am just confused lately. Jilted is the word coming in mind. It’s not my surroundings to be blamed. But I have to stop this high low mood swings! Massive indications of an unstable mind. Will venture into something light. Like yeah, I bought this skipping rope. Now is a good time to start skipping. :).
Just scrolled through the Urbandictionary and made me laugh again!
@TheUrbanSlangs: Bite me – A slightly more polite way to say “Fuck off you prick”.
I think I am going to practise that. :D. And many more ways to keep stifling opinions at bay.