Whatever it is that is holding me back, it is time to put that aside. I think, in general, I have always been an under-confident person, time and again self doubting my capabilities. Sometimes even settling for the less I am afraid. Until I try, I wouldn’t know. Right? Being an optimist helps, because then you see the good in people and find a silver lining in every perplexing situation. That, be good and good comes to you theory y’all! Keeps me content. But for the longest time, I have not felt a drive to prove something, to achieve something, to reach a finish line. I think I will go ahead and set a goal just to amuse myself. As a person, I want to be ever-changing, ever-growing. And if that insists me to step out of my comfort zone, so be it. Let’s do this. To the new challenges and upcoming earnest efforts!
There is devil; there is the deep blue sea; and then there’s you. You came attached with a pre-written warning. Each meeting as uncertain as the next rainfall. Each word spoken to you with a sense of trepidation. Each glare aching to stay. Every moment gone by, yearning to be etched. Every touch emanating a spark; each spark begging not to die. The sparks on which books are written. Too many words spoken, yet emotions left unsaid. A story too short to begin, too close to share, too certain of its end. Doesn’t make it any less worthwhile.
Sometimes, I feel it is an okay thing to be lost and dreamy. To be so immersed in your own disorderliness that propriety feels uncanny. You get comfortable in your skin, not vain, yet extremely defensive of any change suggested otherwise. Things that made you extremely insecure at one point of time do not make much sense now. You have outgrown your own subtle dilemmas; outgrown some ties; probably outgrown some people too. Came in terms with your follies. Forgiven yourself and forgiven people who may have wronged you in the past.
Watched this movie today: Mr.Nobody, and got stuck to a quote from it:
Every path is the right path. Everything could have been anything else and it would have just as much meaning.
Living in peace does seem like a ridiculously difficult summit to achieve but one can always work in that direction.
P.S. : The title could even be Sleep Deficit Grown up talks. :D.