The beauty of pain is that it seeps into you slowly. It will hurt a lot in the beginning, little later it would sting every waking moment, and then it will ever so slightly pinch and before you know it, you are breathing pain. It becomes this familiar thing to you. You don’t demonstrate any emotions to it. You don’t feel the restlessness anymore. Your face is all bland. You’re all like….dear pain! Come hither, be my guest. Doesn’t matter any more. It’s not that you don’t want to be happy. Yes you do. You try. But that whacky little piece stays. What do you do? Give it space. Freedom. Time. Let it in. And one day without your permission, it will be out.
Taking a deep breath and clicking on this plus sign to write something…I am sad. There i admitted it. Not as sad like 🙁 but sad like :|. Ever since i lost this person in my life i have been sad. Actually he lost me, and see what have i done to myself! Feel like a walking machine. Like a void has occupied my system ever since. Doing all the normal things human beings do…bath, brush, eat, sleep. Stay busy. Then again i say to myself..enough of this crap! ENOUGH of sulking! My friends are getting tired of my behavior. I myself am getting tired of it. Let’s end it here, I daily repeat to myself. Has made me realize how inconsistent I am on my words. God if you are out there, i think you are reading this. And I think you are checking on me. Please get me out of this mess. I am reaching out to you with all my earnest emotions. Year is coming to an end. Let’s give it a rest. No more sulky posts. No more rantings. Seriously. Turn me into a free bird this year. If that is too much to ask for, please turn me into a fledgling at the least. I’ll find my way out from there.