…and will be delayed in doing so, as I am in writing this post.
Happy Women’s Day that was yesterday! 🙂
Ah! Another December. Aren’t they intense? And aren’t they inexplicably beautiful, in thought and sight? Don’t they make you put your thinking caps on? Winters suddenly feel chillier. And you sit and start looking back at the year gone by. How it changed you. How you evolved into something different. Last heard, this time of the year, you were some version of yours and now you have upgraded to xyz.2015.1.0. You met new people, got into new jobs, went through some break ups, gained some pounds, lost some pounds, travelled new lands, created new memories. Now, as December heralds, there is this urgency in my head, that the moments I have lived shouldn’t fade. Where do I store them? How do I remember them all? The year-end is coming close and it feels like something is escaping my hands too. Wish I could make a movie of it all and save in my hard disk as I do with other good stuff I find online. Is this why they say every beautiful thing comes to an end? And every end is a new beginning?
Dear December, I want to hold you close and not let go. But as we don’t have that option, let me embrace you in all your flavours and cherish your charm, till it lasts.
One day, when you look back, it will all make sense. The happenings, mishappenings. Your staleness and exuberance. Triviality and enormity of the events around you. It will all come rushing in as a huge palpable epiphany. However, this isn’t the time to seek sense. For now, angels in the sky hint: keep striding forward. Don’t wince. Smile if you may. Because one day, when you look back, you’ll find a million reasons to.
I am looking forward to tomorrow…such a beautiful thought to end the day with.
I don’t know where my life is heading towards. I don’t have everything sorted out. I haven’t planned a millisecond ahead of this moment. I have nothing under control. I have no fucking clue. Infact I am clueless as the wind, on which direction to perambulate next. I live in the present. Yet, I look forward to tomorrow. Life ain’t bad.
Once you have seen something bad…been through something wrong..your mind becomes cautious. You don’t trust easily…you doubt every good action done to you…you read between the lines…watch every step you take with circumspection. The spontaneity you once fostered is missing..you are wary of taking a full dive this time..you are scared to put your efforts into something new..with the fear of consequences. How wrong could it go? How bad could it be? You’ll hit the ground again? One should never stop believing in miracles. That’s what I have read..seen a zillion times in movies..heard in motivational talks.
If one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better.
I guess Jane Austen is trying to put some sense into me from the yore. Your past may be blue, grey or yellow. It won’t help you determine your present or future’s tint. So I would say..Jump in, again!