Ramblings continued..

Why do i feel like an alien in this whole wide world? Like i am all alone and strayed and nothing would ever free me of my misery. Or nothing would ever make me happy to the core. Deceptions leave you bruised. But I don’t have anyone to blame. Nor do I have a particular reason to stay so. It’s like I am torn between two sides of me. One is optimistic, carefree, cheery, tackles everything; the other side is downright pathetic..it talks to self and cannot control tears and feels like a lone ranger when standing in the crowd. I have to cut all the crap about past and future. PRESENT! Don’t waste your present. Make it worthwhile. I want to close my eyes and feel alive again. Like really alive. All spruced up. Like i would smile and the world will melt. :).